cannibalism served hollywood style

so last night, nursing a nasty cold (all together now: aww…), i turned on a Napster free on demand flick. the title being  so cleverly named, “the donner party“. i’ve always loved adventure/survival stories. some of my favorites are, “alive“, “into thin air“,  and “in harm’s way“. anyhow, knowing what i knew about the doomed donners, i thought this would be right up my alley.

not quite. i may like survival stories but only if they contain mostly true elements with some dramatic liberties in the mix. but in this film, “based on a true story“, the donners were committing suicide to save their loved ones, drawing straws to find out who was next in line to be dinner and shooting each other when no one was volunteering (shame on you, Crispin Glover!). in truth none of that actually happened. the donners only ate the flesh of those who died naturally. come on, they may have been starving but they weren’t homicidal maniacs.

but then i asked myself, does cannibalism really need to be spiced up? (oops…pun alert)  i mean doesn’t eating your friends and family contain enough dramatic elements on its own? do we really need murder and suicide to help keep a modern audience interested?

i just hope James Cameron doesn’t do a film about the donners. oh, God,  i can hear the dialogue now:

my love, my life, i eat you